Mad

Let’s share what had happened so I can close this chapter with Mad and move on. I have been saying all the good things about him on here which in fact he has been nice to me. He made me happy most of the times but there were incidents that he made me sad and hurt too. But we did discuss about it like how I mentioned in CAP, in my previous entry.  

 

He promised me lots of things in which thinking back, that shows the level of his maturity. How could a 48 year old man did such things knowing that the consequences of the promises? I was holding back my feelings, did not go out all the way BUT I started to like him more.

 

On Saturday night we chatted like normal how we used to chat. We discussed on CAP and towards the end he had to leave because his wife was looking for him. So that was it yeah. Nothing unusual. 

 

When he called me as promised at 5 pm, that was the time he said he wanted to stop the relationship. I was shocked and I did ask him why? Mind you, we had a few conversation previously where I asked him numerous time if he wants to pursue the relationship and his answer was always yes. I wanted to make sure that he was sure of his decision, because I clearly know what I want.

 

His reason was that an incident happened after the chat. He could not disclose the information of what had happened. And when he was washing his car, he thought to himself, that he couldn't continue and that has to end this. His priority is his family (which I should not comment on this)

 

Few other things that we talked and I was not happy about was when he said that he thinks that I want a man that is available for me 24 hours! I did explain again on that but well, don’t think he understand that. Don’t think others understand this too – in which I might write an entry on this. And one more comment he made was about my blog (Mad if you are reading this, I think you should stop, please concentrate on your wife and kids). His comment was that I portray myself in blog as happy go lucky person but deep down in my heart I need a man in every minute of my life. Oh well, you only read my recent entries, you only know me for 42 days, and now you know me bloody well? I should reserve my comment on that too because we are over anyhow. 

 

So that was it. We ended up just like that. Syukur Alhamdulillah because Allah knows best. This is the best for me. I would be lying if I don’t feel a thing. Yes this hurts me but this is just a small problem if we were to compare the divorce that I went through!

 

At the meantime, I should just relax and do nothing – when it comes to relationship. Too tired and drained me out. To start getting to know someone. I should just enjoy being single as for now – God knows for how long! LOL